Tuesday, May 31, 2011

and so i am and i meditate

When is the thought guiding me and when is there just guidance...one brings with it a sense of obligation, guilt, the shoulds and the musts, with a duality, as if there is something or someone asking me to do or be someone...

the guidance is the sense, the sense of inner knowing, when someone asks you "why", and you reply "no se..."

going down the elevator, watching the numbers, i am so in the moment, mesmerized by the beep at each floor number...the door opens and this person walks in, takes one look at me and whispers "its okay, i won't say a word"...i smile at him, "its okay i am just very relaxed"...

Sunday, May 22, 2011

an eternal moment

I pause between my breaths,
between each exhale and inhale.

a pause is just that, with no holding, no expecting, no waiting,

it is the moment between moments,
an infinite in the finite...

where the essence of form resides.

i live in the pause,
i find the timeless in a lifetime...

in the pause of awareness, life takes on a new meaning, a new direction, a new purpose,
...and i am in eternity, aware of only this moment....

Monday, May 16, 2011

it all started about 4 months ago...

Sitting in the library at the ranch I decided to read my Oracle cards, I am not sure why... I was just sitting and meditating and some unresolved question raised a doubt so I looked around, to support this quest in myself, to seek an answer i opened a card from the Mayan Oracle Reading Book.   

Number 7 - "open your lotus to the world" and "you are the gift"...WOW!!! some of you know my relationship with the lotus flower, so I wanted to read more, and this next phrase jumped out to me " catalyze the mystical power of the 7 chakras to divine illumination"...This was enough to lead me deeper into the exploration, hence began another set of selecting and reading seven cards for the chakras..."something unexpected is coming, that may dramatically change the course of life, fate is touching to move through identification with self to open consciousness", this was the chakra one reading, where our security, our nurturing and the feeling of being grounded resides.  By the time I was on the fifth chakra, I was holding my head in my hand, the stuff that I was reading, was so powerful, that I actually felt the earth move, I just decided to let it rest...

Since that day, life just began to unfold in ways that were closely aligned with what the cards were speaking to me..."notice the metaphors of daily life"... "be aware of where you are drawn, for there you will find unique opportunities"..."the unbridled bird knows freedom by soaring on the updraft"..."be as spontaneous as the wind"..."move with the current of change"..."presence is simple, like being caught in the moment by the beauty of nature"..."expect to be sparked by the memory of a long felt dream"... "life is a grand adventure, each lesson is an opportunity to grow"...

One such event was the arrival of a big yoga group to the ranch.  The week that this group was there, I was teaching and leading the morning sessions, including the 6 am meditation.  Many of the retreat participants joined me in the session.  I did not realize then that the few hours spent with two of them, Fran and Rosalie,  would catalyze me to where I am right now, sitting, in a beautiful room, in the home of Rosalie Grazzini, as I write....I arrived here two weeks ago, and immersed myself with six other yoginis in yoga teaching and learning....

Fran who received me at the airport, took me to her retreat and I walked into a pathway strewn with rose petals, I had no words left...

Debbie Norris, of The Mindfulness Center, where we have spent many long hours, her own spirit and presence both light and strong, as we learn together she brings so much of her own knowledge, wisdom and experience into the teachings. 

Rosalie and her beautiful family, have welcomed me into their home and life, like we have known each other for a lifetime.  To do justice to this experience, I will write the Grazzini family experience separately... 

The three days that were spent at the retreat have been very powerful.  So much of "unmasking" has happened, which allows us to move deeper into our practice.  Fran opened her beautiful retreat to us, and this morning concluded our stay, by sharing how this was her "Field of Dreams", she had built this space, and we came, as the manifestation of her dream.

What I would like to share with you is the letter read by Fran Cohen on Friday, as Rosalie, Debbie, Mary, Sharon Kathryn and I, sat in her beautiful retreat, log cabin, yoga space in the Moyaone reserve, we were spending the days immersed in the forest, receiving the openness of nature to deepen our yoga and the journey within.

May 7, 2011

My dear fellow Yoginis,

I am writing to express how much your presence here, in this space means to me. When I was at Rancho Margot in February of this year, I came from a yoga class that was held on a platform overlooking a pond at the foot of the mountain which shelters the ranch on its eastern side. While the class had begun with the sun, it was interrupted by a magnificent misty rain (not surprising since the Ranch is located in The National Children’s Rainforest.) Some people left, but others continued and witnessed a swarming of “blackbirds” swooping and diving into the pond, as though they had choreographed a dance to entertain this audience.

I left the class and returned to the bar area and the music that was playing was Carly Simon’s, “Blackbird”. The words to the refrain are:

Blackbird singing in the dead of night 

Take these broken wings and learn 
To fly, all your life you were only 
Waiting for this moment to arise. 

Every chakra in my body responded and at the moment, I didn’t even understand what a chakra was! And who should arrive at that very moment, to absorb this message with me? Irum. Irum, of Life is and I am! Irum, our teacher!

So, too, I have been waiting for all of you to “arise” and join me in this moment.

But the moment that I celebrate with you today had another beginning. Seven years ago (yes seven) our dear friend Linda Weiner passed away. We had been visiting Linda at Johns Hopkins Hospital in Baltimore. Linda with her extraordinary enthusiasm and optimism said to me, “Fran, you know what I am putting at the top of my To Do list when I get out of here? Meditation!” Linda would die two days later. Neither of us could have known and neither of us would have accepted that would be our last time seeing each other. When we left the hospital, I returned to the cabin and put my energy into clearing the forest and it was at that moment that I saw the magnificent potential for what is today the, Life is and I am yoga studio.

So I dedicate this sacred time and space to Linda and I thank her for planting the seed of inspiration in me as her parting gift. I dedicate the purpose of this space for healing through acts of love and kindness.
Together, while you are here, we will walk in silence to the “Grandmother Tree”, where I will read these words of Linda and of all the ancestors that each of us holds in our hearts.

Seek me on the wind Beloveds, and see me in the 

Sunrise and sunset, touch me in all whom you meet. 
Dance the fire with me, because we are the flame 
Of hope and the promise of fulfillment! 
You are…..the I AM” 

Wisdom Path Teacher/Cherokee/Caucasian


Sunday, May 8, 2011


what is time?

...like time is the separation, the separation between two or multiple points, it is the measurement of space, the space that exists in the physical realm, between any points of reference.   In that space life happens.

if there was no space, no physical space then time will not matter.  Yet it does, because we not only have a physical body, but an astral body.